How to Build Trust With Your Real Estate Agent

There is a strange gap in how people feel about real estate agents. When Gallup asked Americans in December 2025 to rate the honesty and ethics of real estate agents, 17% said high or very high. (HousingWire, citing Gallup) Yet 88% of buyers would use their own agent again or recommend them, and 87% of sellers would recommend theirs. (NAR 2025 Generational Trends Report; NAR 2025 Profile of Home Buyers and Sellers) People distrust the profession and trust their person. The difference is built one transaction at a time, and it runs in both directions. Here is what each side owes the other.

Trust runs both ways

The legal floor under trust

Trust in this business is not only a feeling; most of it is codified. In Mississippi, a buyer’s or seller’s agent owes the client “the fiduciary duties of loyalty, confidentiality, obedience, disclosure, full accounting, and the duty to use skill, care, and diligence,” and owes everyone else “a duty of honesty and fair dealing.” (MREC Working With a Real Estate Broker form) The license law makes “any substantial misrepresentation in connection with a real estate transaction” grounds for losing the license. (Miss. Code § 73-35-21) And the REALTOR® Code of Ethics opens with the same idea: agents “pledge themselves to protect and promote the interests of their client,” while remaining “obligated to treat all parties honestly.” (NAR 2026 Code of Ethics, Article 1)

What that means practically: an agent who lies to you is not just untrustworthy, they are risking their livelihood. Most do not. Trust problems are more often about incentives, silence, and surprises than outright deceit.

The incentive problem, and why you should ask about it

The most-cited study of agent incentives compared roughly 98,000 suburban Chicago sales, about 3,300 of them homes the agents owned themselves. “The agent-owned houses stay on the market almost 10 days longer and sell for about 3.7 percent more than comparable houses owned by the people who hire real-estate agents to represent them.” (NBER Digest on Levitt and Syverson) The explanation is arithmetic: an extra $10,000 on your sale is worth a few hundred dollars to an agent on a percentage fee, but it is worth $10,000 to you. The agent’s incentive leans toward closing; yours leans toward price.

This does not make agents dishonest. It means the trustworthy ones name the incentive before you do. A fair question in a first meeting: “When would you tell me to wait for a better offer, even though waiting costs you time?” The answer should include a specific example.

Five things a trustworthy agent does without being asked

1. States the fee in writing, early. Buyer agreements must disclose the fee as a specific amount or rate and include “a conspicuous statement that broker fees and commissions are fully negotiable and not set by law.” (NAR) Listing agreements in Mississippi must state “the considerations to be paid.” (MREC Rule 3.2(B)) Vagueness about money is the fastest way to lose trust; a number on page one is the fastest way to earn it.

2. Discloses vendor relationships. Federal law prohibits “any fee, kickback or other thing of value” for settlement-service referrals, and affiliated arrangements require written disclosure. (CFPB, 12 CFR § 1024.14) An agent who says “here are three lenders, I have no stake in any of them” has told you something you can verify.

3. Shows the data, especially when it is unwelcome. Sellers rate pricing help as the single most valuable thing an agent does. (Zillow Consumer Housing Trends Report 2026, Sellers) The trustworthy version is the comparable sales on the table and a recommended price that may be lower than you hoped. The untrustworthy version is the highest number in the room.

4. Keeps a communication rhythm. Sellers rate responsiveness as very or extremely important at 77%, right behind trustworthiness at 80%. (Zillow 2026, Sellers) Buyers mostly prefer text (53%) over phone (33%). (Zillow) An agent who sets the channel and the schedule on day one, then keeps it in slow weeks, is building trust in the weeks when nothing else is happening.

5. Delivers bad news first and in full. A failed inspection, a low appraisal, a buyer who walked. You should hear it from your agent before you hear it from anyone else, with options attached.

Five things you can do

1. Tell your agent the real numbers. Nineteen percent of 2026 buyers said they overestimated what they could afford. (Zillow 2026, Buyers) An agent working from a number you inflated, or a payoff you guessed at, will give you advice that is wrong through no fault of their own. Confidentiality runs in your favor here: what you tell your own agent stays with your own agent.

2. Say what you actually want, then update it. Buyers’ top request is help finding the right home. (NAR 2025 Generational Trends Report, Exhibit 4-2) That requires a brief, and briefs change after the third showing. Tell them.

3. Give feedback after every showing. “Not this one” is useful. “Not this one because the backyard is too small” is more useful. Silence is useless.

4. Do not go around your agent. Calling a listing agent directly while you have your own agent, or talking to the other side’s agent about your position, undercuts the person whose job is to protect you. The Code of Ethics requires agents to deal through your representative rather than with you directly, except when you initiate it (NAR Standard of Practice 16-13), so when you call the other side, you are handing them a loophole.

5. Honor the agreement, or end it properly. If the relationship is not working, say so, call the broker, and get a written release. Post #18 in this series covers how. Quietly using a second agent while the first agreement is in force is a trust violation that can also cost you a second commission.

Trust and fair housing

Trust also means the agent treats every client the same way. In 2024 the National Fair Housing Alliance recorded 32,321 fair housing complaints nationally. (NFHA 2025 Fair Housing Trends Report) The National Association of Real Estate Brokers, whose members are REALTISTS®, was established in 1947 as “the oldest minority professional/trade association in America” (California Department of Real Estate Reference Book), and its stated mission is “Democracy in Housing.” (NAREB) I wrote a book about discrimination in American real estate because the history is long and the practices are not all in the past. An agent you can trust is one who would give the same service, the same listings, and the same advice to anyone who walked in the door, and who can tell you how they make sure of it.

Frequently asked questions